8
For the first time in seven years, Stefan began to learn about Mindy’s past. She didn’t have many things. Or
many hobbies. The only notebook she owned was filled with his preferences.
[Stefan doesn’t like lamb, or sweets. He likes spicy food.]
A small note was scribbled below: But cumin lamb is the best! And my sweet tooth thinks dessert is delicio- us! I hate spicy food, it’s bad for my stomach.
[He doesn’t like people touching things in his study.]
I accidentally touched something while cleaning. He’ll probably hate me if I tell him.
[He doesn’t like people watching soap operas.)
If I invite him to watch with me, will he say no?
…
4/11
00.04
00.04
Chapter 2
The last entry:
[He has someone he can’t forget. He doesn’t love me.]
Memories flooded back as if a dam had broken.
Her pushing a plate of cumin lamb and a freshly bought dessert toward him, her eyes sparkling with anticipa- tion, hoping he would just take one bite.
Her peeking into his study on a busy weekend, quietly asking, “Do you want to watch a show with me?”
Her accidentally messing up his study.
Each of these moments was Mindy, pleading for a scrap of his tolerance, of his love.
And what did he do?
He had made rejecting her a habit. He had watched her face flush red from the spicy food, her eyes watering as she asked to change the dish, and had casually said, “I like it. No need to change it.”
Some things, you only realize how much of a monster you were when you look back.
Mindy had lived like that for seven years. Her notes grew denser, more detailed. Stefan stared at the words, a crushing weight settling on his chest.
Was she made of clay? Did she have no temper?
She had diligently recorded another person’s likes and dislikes, never once considering that all his pickiness stemmed from a heart that simply didn’t care.
Stefan sat alone in the house for a long time. Raina’s calls came again and again, finally stopping on the day
she married another man.
Time flew by. But Mindy’s face only became clearer in his mind.
Did he love Mindy?
He hadn’t before.
And now?
He didn’t know.
His childhood had been a miserable one. His father’s education methods had been pathologically strict, dooming him to a life spent chasing an idealized, pure love. He couldn’t forget Raina because, in his most desperate year, she was the first person to approach him without regard for his family’s status. Her voice, her smile, had become an anchor, hooking him for the rest of his life as he blindly searched for that single sliver of warmth.
Then came Mindy.
5/11
00:04
00 05
Chapter 2
He had suspected her motives, convinced she was only after his wealth and power. So he had split his heart in two. One half to chase his first love. The other to test Mindy’s sincerity. He thought that if he were cruel enough, heartless enough, he could play God with another person’s heart.
But those who play with hearts will eventually face retribution.
His reckoning had been seven years late.
When he finally realized that he had been loved by Mindy, so steadfastly, the attachment he had deliberately suppressed for years out of fear burst forth like a flood.
And when the tide receded, Mindy was gone.
All that was left was a desolate, barren swamp. A love could not grow in such impoverished, filthy soil.
So Mindy left.
This reality was a poison, eating away at him from the inside.
He missed her so much. He missed her to death.
Stefan lay on the sofa for a very, very long time, clutching one of Mindy’s pillows.
Finally, his phone lit up, vibrating violently. The man on the sofa stirred, answering the call, his voice hoarse.
“Who is it?”
Yara’s hysterical shout came through the phone. “You bastard! Did Mindy call you at the end?! She called you
right before she died! I don’t believe she didn’t tell you where she was!”
“I can’t believe you were still entangled with Raina all these years!”
“Did you know Raina and the kidnapper were working together? You two monsters! You’re murderers!”
Stefan listened in silence. In that moment, he was a man sentenced to death, his eyes devoid of light.
His chest ached. A wave of nausea rose from his stomach, and he stumbled to his feet, collapsing next to
the trash can. The violent movement knocked over the beer bottles on the coffee table.
Stefan heaved until he was empty, his vomit streaked with blood.
Yara’s sobs came through the phone. “What did she say to you? I was her best friend, why would she call a scumbag like you? She must have been in so much pain before she died!”
The last bit of color drained from Stefan’s face. He thought of that final call.
Mindy, crying, telling him, “It hurts.”
She had said, “Will you marry me? Please?”
She had said, “Save me, please?”
And his reply had been: “Raina’s back. My promise… is off the table.”
6/11
00.05
Chapter 2
The phone slipped from his hand, shattering on the floor.
Stefan knew he was finished. He collapsed to his knees, covering his face, and began to laugh.
“I’m a bastard. I’m a bastard. Hahaha, I’m a bastard!”
